Dear Stewart,

Hello, my friend! How are you? What's up since your appearance on Storage Wars?

I have to say, my TV watching has taken a serious hit. I guess having a 13 month old will do that. Yep: my son is 13 months old, TODAY! I can't believe it. We're having a lot of fun, though in the last couple of weeks he's had either a couple of different colds or one big long one. It means there are a lot more boogers in my life than I ever thought possible. He also has a cough, which seems to come and go.

On Valentine's Day, he started walking! We were shocked. He's started going to daycare three days a week, and that was the first day of the 3-day week. My husband picked him up at daycare, and called me on his way home to say that "Jules has something to show you." I thought maybe they'd made some kind of funky infant artwork (we have some already, and I LOVE IT. Usually it involves stapling leaves to a piece of construction paper or something - they're not making complex art over there), but nope: when I walked in the door, he was playing with my husband, and walking a little. He was pretty tired by then, though, so he saved the real performance for me for the next day.

My little marching man!

Since then, he's been walking all over the place. The other day we were out in the front yard, and he was up and down the sidewalk in front of my house. We get a freebie paper in my town, it's called "Beachcomber." I never, ever read it. Who knows, it might be good, but I just don't have the time. It gets delivered rolled up real tight, and has the size and shape of stubby drumsticks. Jules picked up ours, and then waddled over to the neighbor's house and picked up theirs, too. He then walked up and down our street clutching the papers. I think he's ready for marching band, don't you?

Love you,

Irene

I think you should sue.

Dear Stewart,

I finally saw the "Storage Wars" show with you. Thanks for doing that. You've been suspiciously absent lately. I was starting to get worried.

So, hey, I'm at work, inputting (is that a word?) a million employees into this database thing I'm in charge of (some of our employees have awesome names: Saturnina, Senen, Yoko, to name a few...), and because tasks like this tend to make me a little cuckoo without music (the background noises in my office somehow come to the forefront of my brain; when that happens I type a lot slower. Oh, and a couple diet Cokes helps, too), I'm listening to my "Klark Kent" Pandora radio station. I'm about 12 songs in, and still no actual Klark Kent, though. That tricky Pandora!.

Anyway, a "Hootie and the Blowfish" song just came on.

WTF, Pandora? Graham Parker, the Jam, the Vapors (and not "I Think I'm Turning Japanese," either, which was surprising but fine with me): those bands make sense on a Klark Kent station. But HOOTIE and the BLOWFISH? I put a big thumb down on that one. Hopefully they get the message. And play me some KK hotness soon. I'm getting impatient, Pandora. Make me wait any longer and they can suck my socks.

Love you,
Irene

Dear Stewart,

It's been awhile since I've written to you, and I wouldn't be surprised to learn that you've given up on me. Actually, I wouldn't be surprised to learn that you have no idea who I am. Really. I'm not delusional.

However, writing to you has always been a fun exercise for me, and if pointless, well, hey, what's the Internet for if not pointless exercises? This is what I do instead of watching cat videos. Or I should say, this is what I used to do instead of watching cat videos: my now (adorable, music-loving) one-year old baby keeps me pretty darn busy.

Anyway, imagine my surprise the other day when I got a message from my sister-in-law that said:

Stewart Copeland is on Storage Wars!

The baby was sick that week, so I was a little distracted. Putting him to bed was really hard; he was pretty miserable. I was concerned because he wasn't eating that much; he had a low fever for several days. This meant that I didn't get a chance to watch any TV that week. I was worried about him, and tired.

Now, let me be totally honest: "Storage Wars" isn't a show that captivates me all that much. Mostly because it seems to be another version of "Pawn Stars," and I got bored with that show pretty quickly. Maybe the concept is OK but it's the people who annoy me? I do kind of like Mike and Frank from American Pickers, but I can't do a whole hour of that show, either. I say that knowing full well that you are (apparently) buddies with Barry Weiss, one of the "characters" on Storage Wars. He's just about the only person on the show who has a personality worth watching on television. (Those two with the "store"? No. I can't even be bothered to learn anybody's name; seriously, this show is not for me.)

However, knowing that you were on made me want to watch.

For the next couple of days after I heard about this, I did tune in to A&E to see if I could magically catch your appearance, but my timing with you has been off for awhile, and it just didn't happen. I found a clip on Huffington Post but I haven't gotten a chance to watch it yet. Dude. I've been really busy.

Still, I know where it is when I finally get a chance to watch it, and that right there makes me very happy indeed.

Love you,
Irene