Dear Stewart, (Updated; Spelling Errors Corrected)

Well, so you missed it.

My show closed last night, and it was an amazing closing night. We sold out! While that's a pretty awesome thing (we even turned away 15-20 people), and I'm definitely not complaining... it would've been nice if some of those people had not chosen to wait until the last night of the play to show up. Still: a full house is an great thing, and it was a fun night (a friend of mine rather sarcastically whimsically suggested that all those people were there to see if you were gonna show up, to which I replied, "Dude, if 45 people are reading my little Stewart Copeland blog, I will pee my pants").

So during the first half of the show I was thinking about all the things you were missing out on. Here are are few of them. Regarding "The Trojan Women" by Charles Duncombe as presented by City Garage theatre, you will never see, hear or know:

• The way Crystal Sershen says the word "Janjaweed" or the context in which she uses it or how she is placed during this moment.
• My impeccable timing in light cue 18, during which June Carryl made a microscopic change in position while saying the words "That cunning bitch [LIGHT CUE!] Menelaus's shame." For some reason I got a huge kick out of that cue.
•  What celebrity means to Helen of Troy (basically? that celebrities are built up by us, the untalented, and then ripped down by us because we're jealous of their fabulosity).
• Michael Galvin sing a beautiful and disturbing song in Irish. I say "disturbing" but I don't really know what he was saying - all I can say is he delivered and sold it and it was lovely and rousing all at the same time.
• David E. Frank as a deranged CNN-type commentator (or, "explicator"). He had about two pages worth of crazy dialogue, which he delivered while wearing a sleeveless black tube dress and a red bolero jacket. Now that you would've enjoyed seeing.
• The eyes of all the ladies in headscarves. Those actresses on stage? Piercing. Strong. Scary. Beautiful.

Anyway, after awhile I realized that pretty much all the moments in this show were interesting, gorgeous, heartbreaking, sometimes funny, and true. You missed out on a wonderful evening. I would've even bought you a drink.

Oh, well. Maybe I'll see you at "The Marriage of Figaro." I'll let you know as soon as we get some dates.

Love you,
Irene

P.S. I checked my visitor stats, and this stupid little Stewart Copeland blog has had significantly more than 45 readers. Hey, man! Pants = peed! Thanks everybody!