What the hell is this?

I Can't Stand [Meeting] You is a collection of all the ridiculous things I've written to and about drummer and composer Stewart Copeland.

I actually did meet him for about five crazy seconds in 2007, again for a few exciting moments in August 2009, and my most recent (and most thrilling!) encounter took place in October 2009, where I proved myself capable of being, yet again, a total dork in the man's presence.

I can't believe what I get up to. And neither should you.

Tuesday, April 24, 2012


I've been re-reading some of my old posts here, and I realized that the ones that aren't letters to Stewart are some of the funniest things I've ever written.

Why I never renamed this blog "I brake for old guys" (a good idea that got lost in the shuffle) is totally beyond me.

I guess I never did write any more installments in the saga of Irene and Stewart...

I wonder why?

When we last saw our heroine, "Irene Casarez," she was talking about her marriage, her relationship with Stewart, and trying to not sound like a dick about it. She'd been getting great reviews on her debut album, and performing all over the country with her band. She had long hair. She was obviously in love with a man 20 years older than she was, all while continuing to be married to somebody else. Oh, and the older guy? Also married. And famous. And a grandfather.

That was a fun story but I guess I got all twisted up in the morality of it. Even though it was, ahem, fake.

I should've just concentrated on the music stuff, and the fame stuff, and the love affair (ooh, I said "love affair"). Instead I got sidetracked by the moral stuff, and that's not good, at least, not when you're trying to write a compelling story and your name isn't John Irving. I think if I take up this story again, I'm going to have there be some consequences for ol' "Irene Casarez," but I want to see her ride off into the sunset with her man, too.

Which man that turns out to be remains to be seen.

Stewart, if you have any tips for this story, I would love to hear them. You know where I am; go ahead, contact me. What do you think? Should I just go for it? 

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